Parking Debacle*

Dear Mr Kyle (MP)¹
I hope you might indulge me
In answering a question
That’s troubling increasingly:
A particular vexation
Of living near Hove station
And made much worse in summer it seems
With tourists, friends and relations in streams
Trickling down the A23
To spend a day or more down by the sea,
Each seeking a spot for their motor car
Irrespective, it seems, of where they are
(The Pay and Display no deterrent at all-
Some of the tariffs plain set to appal
But in the end, a testament
That convenience triumphs this enforced road-rent…),
But my house, it has no garage lot
So I pay for my on-street parking spot
A hefty annual, hard-earned fee
Which frankly doesn’t seem fair to me,
With no promise of a space in mind
Where I might stable my four-wheeled hind.
I do resent the money required
With no guarantee of a spot for my tyres;
With no marked bays and plenty of folk
Whose spatial capabilities are a bit of a joke…
(Either that, or they think their car
Is something a bit spectac-u-lar,
Deserving considerable extra space
In an ordinary residential place).
How comes it wealthy residents on nearby hills
Have driveways and garages but use the road still…?
Where, pray, the justice in their blocking of byways
With absolutely nothing to pay….??!²
Then there’s the business of cars per household,
A modern necessity for the young and the old,
Each one keen to park near their doorstep
To avoid the inevitable luggage-laden schlep,
From parking spot to home sweet home
Sometimes more than a bit of a roam,
A situation made so much worse
By lazy parkers, plainly perverse
In brakes applied with yards to spare
-“You could fit two thirds of a car in there!!!”
If only each driver would compromise
And walk a few yards… it’s no surprise
There’s be a spot for one and all
No need to bluster, swear and ball,
The chorus of each work-day’s end
Something we might all amend
To something civil, a little refinement
By parking with a will for practical alignment…



* ’nuff said, really.   (Rip-Off Brighton…)

¹-Local MP for Brighton and Hove (actually)

²–All the Droves and Droveways…


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